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Amy Chua, the notorious “Tiger Mom”, described it as the “triple package”. This is the idea that minority groups such as Jews and Asians experience disproportionate success because of shared values, which spring from the immigrant experience – namely insecurity and outsiderdom, “good impulse control”, and what she refers to as a “superiority complex”. It essentially boils down to the sense that immigrants have to work harder to succeed, something that characterised both Chua’s Asian background and her husband, Jed Rubenfeld’s, Jewish upbringing.
But are there more similarities between Jews and Asians – and do these similarities mean that relationships between the two will be disproportionately successful? The couple met while on a social sciences masters’ programme at the University of Chicago.
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They’ve worked together to research how kids with mixed Asian-American and Jewish heritage think about faith. The Kim-Leavitt family hide caption. Chung and her husband, Maury Povich, had just announced their intention to adopt a half-Chinese, half-Jewish child. At this, my mother, watching on TV in our living room, did a double take.
She looked at the screen.
While most of the Jews were Ashkenazi (of Eastern European origin), the Asians’ origins were Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Filipino, Southeast.
Fast forward a decade, and the Jewish-American Leavitt and the Korean-American Kim, by then married and soon to become parents to the first of their two children, started to notice that not a week went by without at least one Asian-Jewish couple appearing in the New York Times wedding announcements section. Kim, 43, an associate professor of sociology, and Leavitt, 47, an associate dean of students at Whitman College in Walla Walla, Washington, started to wonder whether marriages between Jews and Asians were becoming a trend, and if so what draws these couples together — and how do they decide how to raise their children given racial, ethnic and sometimes religious differences?
As academics, they also noticed that there was a complete absence of exploration of the subject of Jewish-Asian couples despite there already being a significant amount of sociological literature on intermarriage in general. The most engaging sections of the book deal with the everyday lives of Jewish American and Asian American couples and the decisions they make in terms of racial, ethnic, cultural and religious identities as they raise their children, and with how the grown children of such families perceive their own Jewish identities.
Significantly, they delve into what all this means for the American Jewish community as a whole. The couples varied widely in terms of religious identification and involvement, ethnic background, sexual orientation, gender pairings, and presence or absence of children. Despite the stereotype of an Asian American woman married to a white Jewish man, half of the heterosexual couples involved a white Jewish woman married to an Asian American man.
A Jewish-Asian Couple’s Union Leads to a Scholarly Interest in Intermarriage
But when I do, I mostly stick to shows with a focus on romance. Whether in reality shows like Love Island and The Bachelorette or fictional series like The L Word and Modern Love , I am constantly finding women like myself—women of color—left out of romantic lead roles. Instead of being on the receiving end of a healthy romantic relationship, they often play the friend, the roommate, or the one who is undeserving of healthy love.
The show follows Mickey, a young white woman living in Los Angeles who struggles with alcoholism and sex addiction. Despite her very apparent flaws, she has no problem attracting men and ends up in a relationship with a guy named Gus.
Twice I’ve been in serious relationships with Jewish men who’ve said my Christianity wasn’t a problem. Until it was.
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She noticed there was a similar concentration of Asian women at past fraternity functions—by her count at least a third of the dates were always.
And you know, according to all sorts of sources—including the New York Times — it does seem to be a thing. People usually cite the most popular examples, e. But this is all beside my point. At first glance, we might fit the bill. Our friendship began, developed, and thrived while we acted and sang over the course of those four years. It continued as each of us dated our own high school sweethearts.
A Portrait of Jewish Americans
Sometimes, when the world seems crazy out there, we all get that inside voice going. You know what I mean; it’s like the talk bubble in a cartoon. Let’s say you’re out alone one summer night and you pop into a sushi bar. You’re single and hot with your creamy, caramel-colored skin, and the white guy at the end of the sushi bar eyes you.
So you cozy up your multiracial, muttilicious , Taiwanese-Latina self to the sushi bar, two seats away from him. How does that work?
New York City’s least remarkable interracial couple is the Asian American woman/Jewish man. In middle-class, over-educated enclaves of.
Kim: From the perspective of our interviewees, they understand the non-individual connections as predominantly rooted in a shared set of values. The ones more frequently mentioned were the emphasis on education and a tight-knit family. A lot of people also mentioned work ethic and respect for elders. Those were the predominant reasons that shone through in terms of the connection at the level of values. If we look a bit further afield, Jews and Asians often live in the same communities.
They go to the same schools and they work in the same places. Aside from values, these are points of connection that bring Jewish-Americans and Asian-Americans together. Kim: I am the child of Korean immigrant parents, and I was born in California. I see that discussion and presentation of the Jewish community really changing in very significant ways.
With Jewish-Asian marriages on the rise, academic couple takes on subject close to home
So it is unsurprising that they shared this famous app to explore the wider meaning of their attraction. Zuckerberg was raised Jewish and had a barmitzvah but describes himself over an atheist, while Chan is a Buddhist whose parents came to America from Vietnam. The couple are famously famous despite the implicit irony there and rarely talk publicly about their relationship. Nonetheless, paediatrician Chan and billionaire app superstar Zuckerberg are prime examples of Chua’s “triple guy”.
They are famous and non, both professionally and, with the birth of promo daughter Max in , personally.
My father was a Jew who resented his Russian immigrant parents, resented being discriminated against in the Bronx (“Hey, fat Jew boy!”).
This is not new to me. I hear this all the time because my last name ends in “burg,” a common Jewish suffix. So I wasn’t surprised when I heard it from Arnold, a new friend of mine from the local gym in Cleveland Heights, Ohio. He knew my last name because I had handed him my business card weeks before.
And he was, after all, as bold as the espresso in the coffee shop where I met him. When he asked me, over coffee, I shook my head and smiled. As this is not the first time I have had this conversation, I have my stock responses at hand, but yet I replied, “No, I’m not actually. I was raised Catholic. Why do you ask? As a Western woman married to a Chinese man, I knew I was a minority when compared to the ubiquitous couples of Western men and Chinese women around the world.
But all of a sudden, I wondered if I also was a minority within the world of Western wives and Chinese husbands. Was Arnold right? Do more Jewish women really love Chinese men? Could there be any truth to this?
The Jewish Chronicle
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Black women are often depicted as being difficult, loud, and hypersexual.
My husband’s father and mother are Jews. My parents are both what Mr. Hitler would be pleased to call ‘Aryan’ Germans. I am an American-born girl, and the first to defend my Americanism in an argument; yet so strong are family ties, and the memory of a happy thirteen-month sojourn in the Vaterland a few years ago, that I frequently find myself trying to see things from the Nazis’ point of view and to find excuses for the things they do—to the dismay of our liberal-minded friends and the hurt confusion of my husband.
Here we are then, Ben and I, a Jew and a German-American, married for four years, supremely happy, with a three-year-old son who has his father’s quick brown eyes and my yellow hair. Ours was a fervent love match, made more fervent by the fact that we had to wait in secret for two years until Ben earned enough at his profession to support a family. He had known other girls and, as I was twenty-five before we married, I had had my share of other men’s attention.
Consequently our marriage was not the hasty, impassioned leap of two people soaring on the Icarian wings of a first love. That which was between us was calm as the night, deep as the sea; in the light of it we both knew that forever afterwards he would look upon other women, and I upon other men, as pale wraiths. We determined that no obstacle should prevent our union, and obstacles there were a-plenty as soon as our families learned our intention.
Married to a Jew, you will be barred from certain circles. They can say what they like about Germany, but democratic America is far from wholeheartedly accepting the Jews.